Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize