12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Randomize
