he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
