she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
