your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
