I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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