my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
