Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
