11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
