At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
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