This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
