Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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