At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
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