jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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