have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
