Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
