what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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