Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
