I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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