And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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