I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Randomize
