help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize