lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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