if you like me you must not know who I am
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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