i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
