If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
