Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
