You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I can't turn off my feet"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Randomize
