Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I need a burrito and a hug.
You need a sexual gate keeper
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize