the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
