Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
