...so i touched it.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize