Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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