It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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