Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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