You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
