he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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