Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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