i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
