your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize