just tell him i said nine months
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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