I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
