At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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