Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
