So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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