I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
