he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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