if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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