she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He? As in you personified your dick?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
