Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Verdict: uncircumcised.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize