this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
